About falling apart and trusting the process

In this essay, I give an autophenomenographical account of what it is like for me to be late-diagnosed with ADHD while in the process of writing my dissertation. I explain how ADHD is an invisible disability and how little help is offered when the medication does not work. I explore how, because of my ADHD, my brain is at the same time my most valuable resource/tool and my worst enemy. I describe the various challenges in my life, psychological as well as physical, and call for academic institutions to provide structures that allow for non-normative temporalities and ways of doing research. In this essay, I offer some snapshots of my own experiences in the hope that neurodivergent students and scholars will see themselves reflected (and accepted), as opposed to an academic article about neurodivergents written by a neurotypical scholar.